Grace - So Much More Than a Good Idea

Recently the Lord has been taking me on this incredible journey into the immenseness and unthinkable mystery of His grace.  Grace is something that has been always before me, but somehow I never fully saw it.  It's as if I was always looking straight through it, but never directly focused on it.  It's weird to me that I could pay so little attention to something so essential as grace.  It is like the glue that holds basically... well EVERYTHING together.  Without the grace of God we would be no where.  We would be nothing.
So the question is - what is grace?  Is it God ignoring all our faults and flaws so that we can get into heaven?  Is it God giving us something we don't deserve?  Where does it begin?  Where does it end?  Something the Lord has been showing me is that everything that we know and experience in the Christian life is through grace.  Yes, I understood that it was only by God's grace that we are saved.  We can never be good enough to deserve eternal life.  But after we are saved, then what?  How much is God's grace really involved in our lives?  The answer is that His grace is so much more than just involved in our lives.  In fact, it's the other way around, our lives are involved in His grace now.  Because of His grace we are now in perfect union with the Father.  All self-effort is pointless.  Anything we can "do" cannot make us better Christians or help us grow closer to God.  We are ALREADY perfect saints and are ALREADY one with God.  This totally destroys all performance and striving.  How freeing to finally realize - I don't have to do anything!  Praying, reading the Word, ministering are all fruits of being one with God, but they don't help us grow closer to Him.
I just finished reading a book by John Crowder called "Mystical Union".  This book changed everything for me.  At first it was awesome and I could agree with everything he said.  But then he started talking about these radical things like oneness with God.  To be honest, this offended me.  It's comforting thinking that you have some sort of control on your life and relationship with God.  But as I was starting to see that is all truth I have no control, it offended my mind.  But I know that God often allows our minds to be offended so that we are presented with a choice.  The choice is to either reject this new idea because it's too difficult to understand, or to embrace it as being of God.  That's where I'm at right now.  I don't fully understand God's grace.  Actually I feel like I don't understand it at all.  It really doesn't make any logical sense.  But I can feel the life that comes from stepping into his grace.  It is like electricity to my spirit.  It makes me want to laugh and cry and dance and jump all at the same time.  So although it doesn't make sense, I am beginning to at least become aware of it's presence in my life.  It's like a very blurry image, but I can see that it's there.  So I jump head long into the river of His grace.  No looking back!

Whistle While You Work!

                                  
Work, work, work...  Once the best season in the year when you could play all day long, run around barefoot, go on vacations, see friends whenever you wanted, and stay up late.  Now it is the dreaded season for summer jobs, working endless hours at a job that you can't stand, coming home too tired to hang out with people, and sacrificing all thought of fun for the sake of a few hard earned bucks.  Tragic.
Because of countless first-hand reports that I had heard from friends on the subject, this happened to be my idea of what a summer job could and would look like.  And therefore I was beginning to dread the thought of summer.  As the days drew closer I became more and more nervous that my childhood summers of fun were about to come to a harsh end.  However... I learned enough this past year that I carry something in me that is so much greater than anything in the world.  Circumstances can not define my stances.  Hard situations cannot dampen my peace and my joy.  "I have found a peace that plows on through the storm.  I have found a joy that jumps over sadness."  This world cannot make me and it cannot break me.  I have the secret gift (or weapon) of my best friend - Holy Spirit.  So I determined in my heart that although this summer was different due to my first real summer job, I was not going to let it change my attitude.
And, praise the Lord, I was pleasantly surprised when I found out that I actually enjoy working!  I found myself laughing on the way home because contrary to many people's experiences, I loved my job!  God is so good like that.  He loves giving His kids good gifts.  And even when there are hard situations, it's not because He is punishing us, He is giving us the gift of an opportunity to grow.  I love that!
So all this to say that I really am enjoying having a summer job.  It keeps me busy and is bringing in some good finances.  AND I am finding that I have plenty of time to play and enjoy this summer just as much as any other summer.  PTL :)

Do Whatever Makes You Come Alive

Before we left BSSM, some students asked the leaders what they would recommend we do this summer to prepare for 2nd year.  Of course they shared about the importance of maintaining our secret place with the Lord.  But then they said something that came as somewhat of a shock, but a refreshing one.  They said, "Do whatever makes you come alive."  This was a new idea to me.  In the past I have had somewhat of a religious mindset.  I limited myself and even God by believing that the ONLY true good use of my time was alone with God in my prayer closet.  First you have to understand that the secret place alone with the Lord is my most cherished place.  I would rather waste my life at His feet than in doing any other self pursuit.  But when you write this as a law for yourself (I must spend ALL my free time in the prayer closet), you lose not only the value in your choice to be with God, but you also miss the joys that God has hidden for you in many different places and activities.  God is not a boring God!  So many times would I sacrifice doing something I enjoyed because I felt like it was an unholy waste of time.  Or I would feel guilty whenever I spent much time doing those things.  I believe God enjoys all the things we enjoy.  And we can still be in communion with God while doing those things.  I have come to realize how fast time really goes and I want to spend every moment to it's fullest potential.
So what do you enjoy?  What brings you life and fulfillment?  When do you feel the most alive?
As I've embraced this new freedom - freedom from the law - I HAVE found so much life an joy.  Within the last couple of weeks I have taken time to be crazy, laugh a lot, and do what used to seem like a waste of time.  From sipping tea while reading a fictional (gasp) book, to jumping on the trampoline.  Waving a cattail in the wind and watching the fluff be whisked away.  Watching the hysterical unfolding events as my little brothers try to sail their home-made boat (which unfortunately sank instead).  Talking with my best friend while swinging for hours.  Mastering the ancient technique of frisbee throwing in the park.  Walking around down town and getting mostly lost.  Day dreaming.  Finding my hidden creative being within.  Sitting down and intentionally tickling the ivories.  These are all things that have made me come alive and I am making it an unofficial summer goal to continue doing similar things alongside of my already established secret place with the Lord.  I think putting those together will make for one heck of a summer!

Family - The Government of Heaven

Malachi 4:5-6

 "Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet 

Before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the LORD.

And he will turn the hearts of the fathers to the children,

And the hearts of the children to their fathers,

Lest I come and strike the earth with a curse.” 

Family is the government of Heaven.  God is a family man.  Look at the Trinity.  There is the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.  They are incomplete without each other.  Look at Adam and Eve.  Adam was incomplete without Eve even though he lived in Paradise and walked with God.  The importance of family is huge to Papa God.  He holds this design of His closer to His heart than any of His other designs.  It is His secret weapon.  

That is why the enemy is so set on destroying the family unit.  Family is under attack.  In our society, the value of family is decreasing by the day.  Marriage covenants are being flippantly tossed out the window.  Rebellion is filling the hearts of children toward their parents.  Offense and unforgiveness are as cold fingers, prying loved ones apart.  Orphans fill our streets.  They may be masked with success, titles of importance, popularity statuses, etc...  But beneath the surface are little boys and little girls who have never known what it is to have a real father and a real mother.

Over the past few months the Lord has been highlighting to me the great importance of family.  We were never meant to be alone.  We were meant to belong to a family unit, to be known and to be loved as we are.  When we devalue family, we devalue the very heart of God.  It is through family that revival will be sustained.  Each of us must have fathers and mothers in our lives who speak wisdom and direction into us.  We must have people that come alongside of us and will run the race with us.

I feel like I have been richly blessed in the past with wonderful family units.  And the great thing about family, is that it's always expanding.  God is always bringing us new faces that will become brothers and sisters, fathers and mothers.  I love how the Kingdom of God is one big body!

Transition - A Beautiful Thing

2011 was prophesied to be the year of transition.  When I heard this I nodded my head in agreement, thinking, "Ya I'm all for that God!  I'm ready to upgrade, to go from glory to glory.  I never want to be stuck in the comfortable.  Bring on the transition!"  I mean, if I broke everything down to the main reasons I left everything to come to Bethel for this season, was for more of God and to be changed.  As a person who prefers the predictable, comfortable, routine side of life, that was a huge jump.  But I had a vision before me of what the outcome could be.  And to me, that was completely worth any discomfort that change would most certainly bring about. 

Well God seems to take my requests seriously, but God’s way of transition was far different than what I pictured it would be.  I was looking for more of a glorious transition, where things got “better” in my life.  Don’t get me wrong, I believe that everything God does in our lives is taking us from glory to glory.  Romans 8:28 tells us that “all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.”  He is our Papa who wants the best for us.  Everything He does is for our good.  In saying that, not everything He does is easy, clean, or orderly.  Upgrade doesn’t always come to us in a neat little package or in the way that we want it.  But I’m finding that even when transition feels messy, painful, and chaotic, there is so much beauty in the midst of it.  Because it is the hope of greater glory, increase and upgrade that helps us to embrace transition.  Jesus endured the cross for the joy set before him (Hebrews 12:2).  He went through the ultimate transition in history: from being God to becoming man and enduring death.

So these are all thoughts that I am contemplating as I go through the transition right now.  I have gone through transition all year long, so the move from leaving BSSM back to Colorado is just one of the many.  But I am learning to embrace it as a blessing from my Papa.  It’s still funny to me, coming back to what was once so comfortable and familiar and finding that is completely different... Or more likely it is me that is different.